It repeats itself in my concious from time to time, more so as life becomes more complicated.
Quite often in the classroom it seemed I was handling crisis after crisis with students, or massaging professional 'differences' in some way. To a certain extent, this was fine, I had few regular committments or responsibilities.
So, in the past five years, I married, bought a 1880's farmhouse to renovate, adopted a 7 year old, and my parents are 75 and 80, aging, and experiencing many of the illnesses of aging. Ergo the 'more complicated' part. Learning moderation when I am 43 is baffling. How do people do this without cracking up? Or does everyone go a little nuts and that is expected?
This, for me, is the scary part. Summer has always been restorative and recuperative and I start the new academic year ready to go and excited for the new opportunities and education that the students will bring. But I am not at all there, not even close.
I absolutely do not want to be one of those teachers who is there in body but not in spirit. We all know the sort. It is painful to see this when I do.
This piece really struck me. I connected with it in so many ways, the differences in life in the 20's, 30's, 40's, the lack of balance, the parents who are again while also caring for children. I think this could be a really exceptional writing piece that so many teachers- and others- could relate to.
ReplyDeleteThis almost seems like two different stories to me. The first, revolving around balance and how any of us keep it in this crazy world and the other seems more about the incident. Then again, maybe it is one story but again needs some sort of transition between the two or a stronger conclusion that wraps up both in a neat, tidy way. What do you think?
Knowing you as I do, I do not think it possible for you to be in the classroom in body, but not in spirit. You are a sprited person - where you are, there your spirit is also. It seems that you simply do not tolerate places where you (and your spirit) cannot be.
ReplyDeleteI think the scary part comes just before you find reserves you never needed to tap before. They are there - we all are often more capable than we ever knew ourselves to be.